Lonely?

It was a month after I had bid him a final goodbye. Life was not easy at all and loneliness was my company. His cremation had resulted into my burial into work. That was the only way I could keep my mind away from all the memories. I just couldn't imagine my world without him and yet here I was busy, as busy as a bee.That evening I reached home, unlocked the door, entered my lonely nest, locked the door behind me and went straight to my room. After a quick shower, looked into the mirror and moved away without noticing.

He kept looking at me...

Action and Consequences

Sujoy - 

A young man, fresh out of college and in his first job, was super excited to conquer his desires and fulfill his material aspirations. Sujoy had lived a life of discipline and self-deprivation in order to study well. His childhood was full of unfulfilled material wishes; wishes rejected by parents claiming they knew what was best for him. They provided him with the best study material, more than adequate infrastructure to educate him well.

Now all the hard work had fructified and Sujoy had completed an MBA with Marketing from an above average college. He had joined an MNC with a package he was quite boastful of. Although his parents, as usual, felt that he could have done better. He had been just a three month old baby in the corporate world and had absolutely no idea of the nuances of this world. He was clueless about the show-off, the politics, the hypocrisy, the fake appreciations and the cut-throat competition. He was also unaware of another field of management - Finance.

An intern, Surbhit, entered office one day beaming with pride and happiness. He had purchased an I-phone, the price of which was in excess of eighty thousand rupees. The seniors were all gaga about the purchase, appreciating the technology, discussing the greatness of some of the companies in the field of innovation. In general, the intern was a show-stopper that day. Someone even remarked looking at Sujoy, that not everybody knew how to live life. 

Within the next couple of days, Sujoy made an investment decision. At least he thought it was one. He purchased a phone the price of which was in excess of one lakh rupees. He bought it on a one year installment option. Moreover he was certainly proud of the fact that finance company gave him the required credit within no time. Everybody went gaga over his phone now. Today was his day to be the center of attraction. He made sure to meet the colleague who had remarked about how to live life. His father was not particularly happy and appreciative of this decision.

A couple of months passed and a colleague of his, Abhay, got a new bike; a stylish, expensive 250cc bike loaded with features, with an on-road price around 2.8 lakh rupees. Abhay could not stop talking about it, describing his love for his new machine. Sujoy could not resist anymore. He fell out of love with his bike. He felt angry with his father to have given him a basic 110cc bike. He felt he had to upgrade to thrive in the corporate world. There were colleagues talking about how Abhay's personality had suddenly become impressive and how he would be able to convince potential clients and girls just by getting off the bike in style. 

Sujoy had to upgrade. He researched some bikes; he fell in love with a bike and it had some of the latest features, great power 400cc, very stylish. Sujoy knew his personality would benefit immensely. Needless to say, the price was in excess of the one Abhay had bought. The price was 4.2 lakh rupees on road. Could he afford it? Well, Sujoy's father didn't think so. Sujoy was confident. He went to the showroom and was impressed with the finance company's quick response and ability to offer a loan to him. He thought he was getting so much credit owing to his respectable salary, education and his ever developing personality. The finance people were so polite and co-operative; for every document they asked for and that Sujoy didn't have, they had a solution. They ensured that the young lad could buy his dream bike within a week.  Sujoy blessed these angels. He surprised his parents with the new bike. At least he thought so, for them it was no less than a shock. 

Sujoy's father expressed his displeasure at the dinner table. Sujoy was in no mood of receiving a lecture; he made it clear that he could take his financial decisions. The topic ended quite abruptly, so did dinner. A lot was unsaid and unheard.

Next day, was Sujoy's day; showing off his new found love. He had even purchased new pair of clothes to accompany the new bike. A grand brand must accompany another, he thought. As expected, all colleagues were full of awe for the new machine. Some were even envious and Sujoy could feel the pleasure of making them jealous. He loved the praise that he had upgraded his personality. He was loving his life. A new latest hi-end phone, a grand new bike, a job with a respectable salary, some installments though.

The pleasure was quite short-lived for Sujoy. One of his colleagues got a hi-end laptop with latest features. It was his claim to fame that day. He said this was a real investment as the laptop helped him in presentations, it helped him in designing and editing marketing ideas. Another colleague remarked that this was truly an investment as he would open it in front of clients and present to them the idea as well as the laptop. This was in true sense a personality booster and an asset. Things like phones and vehicles were just depreciating assets. Sujoy felt this was said on purpose. His heart burnt. He though to himself that he was going to upgrade his laptop anyway. So may be now was the most appropriate time to do so.

The finance team at the laptop store seemed inefficient to Sujoy. They were asking too many questions, they wanted too many documents. It was as if they were unwilling to give him a laptop. He had to borrow some money from a friend at work to pay the down payment as they made him pay nearly half of the price. The price was in excess 1.2 lakhs. Still they did offer him a credit of around 60% of the price. 'Finance people are always so co-operative and accomodative', he thought to himself. 

So now, he was the coolest guy at office. He had bought a great phone, trendy bike and the latest laptop in a span of six months. 'Could life have been any better?' Parents were as usual unhappy. He had accepted that parents would never be happy with his success. That is what he thought of them. Colleagues and interns were all over him. He enjoyed being the coolest techno-savvy guy. He had the latest games on his phone and laptop. His bike was the fastest and most stylish. He had even given a grand treat to his colleagues at a classic restaurant. A couple of months had passed. 

Sujoy realised that almost 90% of his saving was wiped off in down payments. He didn't mind that, what he was a little concerned about was that nearly 80% of his salary was spent in installments. He just didn't have any money left in hand by the tenth day of the month. Fuel seemed too expensive these days; although the price had risen only by 10% since his last bike. He had to avoid going out with friends for dinners, movies or just some fun long rides. 

He had the gadgets but he was not very excited about them now. The finances were depleting fast. Sujoy's father could sense that things weren't very smooth. With years of experience and wisdom, he had expected this to happen. Sujoy on the other hand was stressed out managing the installments and the private loan from a friend/colleague. The word had spread that the so called friend had lent him a loan. All the glitter and glamour had burnt down by now. The stress took its toll and showed itself on work performance. The boss ensured a detailed criticism in front of the team. After all, his junior had boasted too much over the past quarter with gadgets but the performance was no where near. Sujoy was insulted. He was humiliated so much so, that he considered quitting the job.

Sujoy could not quit. He needed a job. His personal finance was such that he could not risk quitting and then searching for another job. He had to swallow the bitter pill. Stress was high and like never before. Sujoy's father asked if things were fine. Dinner table talks were generally limited as Sujoy was too submerged in his gadgets and thoughts, to talk. Sujoy didn't wish to share but he couldn't resist looking away. He didn't want his mother or father to find out with his facial expression. They already had. Post dinner, Sujoy's father went to his room and sat beside him. He asked Sujoy to share whatever it was. He said it in a tone Sujoy just couldn't resist. He opened up. He told him how he was insulted by his boss, how he wished to quit, how his financial situation was absolutely pathetic, how he was forced to take the insult.

Sujoy's father told him that actions have consequences. He told him about the corporate culture, why his boss might have blasted so much, how the others had, in a way, coaxed him into buying unnecessary things, how the finance people work. Sujoy realised that this lesson he had learnt the hard way.

Sujoy's father guided him with a financial plan. He insisted that Sujoy must work more efficienty in the same company, cut down on unnecessary expenses on snacks, beverages, accessories. Sujoy agreed and went back to some financial discipline. For regular days,  the old bike was out and running again. Petrol didn't seem too expensive on that. He knew he was only facing consequences to the thoughtless financial decisions he had taken. Within a year and half, he had wiped off two loans. He had saved a little better. He hadn't fallen for any comparisons with anyone. He didn't become miserly, however he ceased to be a spend thrift as well.  He was a prudent spender now.

Sujoy had never thought of the financial consequences earlier although now he first thinks of them then the action. He learnt his financial lesson at a young age.

 

Mouthful

One day while having breakfast at a hotel, I noticed the large spread of food laid out for all the guests. A buffet full of colours, flavours, cuisines, beverages, and so much more was on offer for us. I glanced at people around and their tables which were clustered with sumptuous meals. My table was also packed with various dishes and beverages. I was enjoying the abundance that life had blessed me with, when a fact struck me. 

Although I had so much on the table, I could enjoy only one thing at a time. I could only have a mouthful of one thing to enjoy it completely. 

With so many choices on my table, I could not focus on the mouthful, rather focused on what  to eat next. I guess it was the same with everybody around me. 

Now, I enjoy the mouthful to the fullest. I appreciate every bite that is taken rather than the one to be taken. I cherish what I have rather than what I want next.

Farewell

Now, it is time you move ahead,

I bless that you fare well.

Life shall give you opportunities,

I hope that you dare well.

Rumours and wrong reports of you,

I wish that you tear well.

You shall have critics and false friends

I pray that you bear well. 

Success and happiness shall come your way,

I advise that you share well. 

Family and friends might need you,

I urge that you care well.

Life shall bring you probable partners,

I insist that you pair well.

You shall lead teams and offices,

I request that you chair well.

Life shall challenge and when life happens,

I bless that you farewell.